Why it’s Hard to feel Happy

A lot depends on our perspective.

Allow me, if you will, to get straight to the point.

As I see it now, how you see the world depends on your perspective. Each perspective has a kind of energy to it – it could be happy, sorrowful, hyper, angry, honorable. There are many, many perspectives. We look at the world through the eyes of one or more perspectives at any given time, and they shape how we think, feel, and act.

But each perspective is limited, and only brings to it more of what it already is. Unhappy? Everything around you will probably bring you down further. Critical? Hardly anything will seem good enough. Happy? The world looks bright and cheerful.

So, which perspective should you listen to? How do you even “listen” to a perspective? Well, how are you feeling now? The answer to that question will likely show you the perspectives you think are being truthful in the current situation. Curious? You probably agree that reading this article is something worth being curious about. Agitated? Perhaps I’m not striking a cord.

Basically, you feel the perspectives that you, perhaps subconsciously, agree with.



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This way of thinking about feelings might be confusing at first, but remember that it’s not the things around you that MAKE you unhappy, it’s only your unhappy perspective that’s coloring your view of life.

And hey, maybe the “unhappy” perspective is right sometimes. It’s not a good idea to be prejudice against certain perspectives.

But when you remain too close to a certain perspective, when you don’t question it, you might end up shutting out the other perspectives. Instead of flowing from one feeling to the next, you’re stuck with a perspective that just feels awful. However, you CAN get out for those slumps. You CAN be happy.

Let’s make it happen.

Exercise: Get out of a Slump

The following exercise is designed to get you feeling how you WANT to feel, or at least make you feel more at peace with the way you are feeling already.

  1. How do you want to feel? Think of one word to describe it, like “Happy”.
  2. Imagine a version of yourself who IS how you’d like to feel. They might not look like you, just imagine someone or something who represents the feeling you want.
  3. Think about what your imaginary self would say to you right now. Maybe “oh it’s not so bad”. Or “come on let’s go have some fun!” Do you disagree with what it thinks? Why? 
  4. Can you come to some kind of agreement with this side of yourself? Try to work through your differences, or, at the very least, hear them out and everything they have to say.
Feel better? Remember that even if what a given perspective says isn’t true ALL the time, it might still have something valid to say. I hope this technique is something that will serve you during those times when you don’t feel good at all, and is a little something you can pack in your back pocket for emergencies.
All the best, and keep on the lookout for the wisdom of all the different perspectives inside of you!
-Oliver

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