About Oliver Kaufman

Oliver Kaufman just is who he is. Like anybody, he's got a lot of stuff going on inside of him, and, having found a way to share it, created this website to share what he has found that brings value to his own life. He also likes to talk in third person and sound genial and relatable. He has a thing about not being defined by the groups he's been a part of, the schools he's attended, or the kind of people he hangs out with. That's not important to him. What he really likes is finding out stuff in life that is helpful to other people and himself, things that make life better, more enriched, more empowered - and without cheap tactics like fooling yourself into thinking life is better, or more enriched, or that one is empowered when they really aren't. He's not into that. He knows that some people put high standards on themselves and others, they hold up certain people as heroes and ideal people to be like. He doesn't like this. He thinks that everyone has stuff going on inside them, and that paying attention to how things are right now for each individual is what's important. Maybe he's wrong, but talking about all this in his biographical information sure makes him feel good. Also doubtful. He wonders if talking this way, when you the reader probably expected a long-winded list of past events, is off-putting to you. But, in the end, he has decided to just stick with what he likes, and that means sticking with exactly what he wrote. With that, he bids you farewell and hopes you enjoy this site. Thank you!

Writing for Emotional Healing and Personal Transformation

As part of the online book tour I’m doing for my book, The Windless Echo – A Short Story Collection, I did a guest post over on the blog Mythical Books. It was on “Writing for Emotional Healing and Personal Transformation”.

It’s relevant to the topics here, so I thought I’d post it. If you want to check out the article, you can do so here: http://mythicalbooks.blogspot.com/2017/07/the-windless-echo-short-story.html

The article relates to the principles I talk about over on the Inner Storytelling page, but is geared specifically towards those who might be interested in writing, but might not have found a way it can be personal and impactful for them as a writer.

Sensing Inner Energy

Inner Energies

Different elements of a given internal environment can have different energies to them, awareness of which can inform you about where you are.

As you begin to explore the inner world, you may notice that different aspects of it are composed of different types or kinds of energy. There is a unique flavor or “signature” to everything you come across, and it’s this energy that can inspire the forms we see inner entities take in our visions of them.

Take for instance a vision of a lush, green, open landscape, on a sunny day. The landscape itself might have an energy to it, representing, if you sense it, feelings of ease, openness, relaxation and an energized mood. As your awareness explores the landscape, you might sense these aspects, and might be able to explore them with greater specificity: the sun might be inner brightness, the grass has a soft comfortable sense to it, the earth below a solid, stalwartness. And maybe over there, a forest with a sense of mystery and relaxed ease, or the sky, full of a spirit of openness and freedom. You might see a bunny hop over to where you are in this picture, and sense its simple curiosity, as it explores, and goes on its way.

The experience of the inner world, then, can be explored in this way – sensing, with simple awareness, the elements of your inner reality, shifting between images and the energy behind them whenever you choose. Continue reading

Recent Updates

Hello! Just wanted to put out a post on the main blog, about some of the changes I’ve made that haven’t necessarily shown up through subscriptions.

Recently, I added the following:

  • Relaxation – An article about relaxation as a technique for self-awareness and inner balance. Essentially, it seems to me related to what many people call meditation, though this is my own take on it. It seems a relaxed state of being can help one become more aware – and one can let one’s self relax in many areas: physically, emotionally, mentally, in terms of focus, awareness itself, and perhaps others
  • New Video Walkthrough of Drawn Processing – a little over an hour long, this video walks through what a typical session of working through something might be like. Starts with the basics, then explains how processing would proceed from the starting point, and what one might be able to expect as one goes along, through it.
  • Article on Powerlessness – this ailment article goes into the condition of powerlessness, and how indecision over what choices to make can result in this sort of state. Feeling stuck in this state can leave on feeling helpless, since no visible options, sometimes, can seem good. Includes a method for approaching powerlessness, aimed at helping one know what dilemmas one’s going through, and easing you through the process of working through those dilemmas.
  • Article on Shame – another ailment article, this time on shame. Touches on subjects of how shame may relate to the fear of vulnerability, how it functions as a coping mechanism, and how self-kindness can help with it. Includes a process for helping you to work through any shame you might be going through.

I also made some changes to the following articles:

  • Negativity – I went back to this article and reflected on how I expressed things, and refined and edited things a bit where I felt it was appropriate. Specifically I went into certain states and conditions that can emerge from negativity (such as Martyrdom, “Trying to make due”, Complaining, and Addiction), as well as certain principles that are likely helpful when approaching negativity, such as observing and allowing feelings, keeping an open mind, and connecting with what positive states are like. I’ll likely add a step-by-step method soon.
  • Anxiety – Again, I’ve had some new experience working with this ailment, and so I reconsidered and rewrote a lot of the article. I also streamlined the method you can use, which involves uncovering and processing through worries, as well as went into new details about what seems to cause anxiety, and what the experience of it is like. Its root seems related to a lack of trust in one’s self and one’s own capabilities of handling an experience. It can feel like constriction. Furthermore, I go into how anxiety can lead to a desire to control circumstances, in order to avoid what one feels anxious about.

And that’s it! I did some minor other updates to some of the other Ailments articles, but, that’s about it

Oogloog’s Guide to Easing Panic

This guide is from a side of me who goes by “Oogloog”. I’ve come to know him recently through how he’s helped an often anxious side of me to calm down, relax, get patient, and reflect on reality from a more meditative, centered state. It can get easy to get caught up in emotion and the urgent picture one’s own perspective can sometimes paint, so it’s been extremely helpful to have this voice of calm that a more erratic side of me can turn to. Like many cases I’ve seen, this interaction seems to be an example of balance, where two perspectives can inform each other, and move towards greater equilibrium and harmony – in this case, through one side imparting a calming perspective.

In any case, when I queried my inner world recently about whether anyone might like to make a guide, this side of me seemed to speak up, answering that he wanted to write a guide to panic. Again, for those unfamiliar with what I’m doing – these are sides of myself, aspects of my being that I try to sense and distinguish as individuals, marked by their own particular energy, which can express itself in an individual way.

Oogloog’s energy is much like that of stone – patient, steady, solid, grounded. The name itself comes from an attempt to translate that energy into a name, and the throaty, deep pronunciation of “Oogloog” may give you some idea of where he’s coming from – or how to be in that place yourself, in a sense.

That said, this guide on panic is not a definitive guide. I try to let him talk in his own way, without many disclaimers or caveats. However, I encourage you to take this as you will, and not as something that will guarantee you better success with panic. It may help you, indeed, and this approach may give you something valuable for your toolkit. Just know, there may be many other aspects to the issues of panic, and more specifically your panic, when you encounter it.

Oogloog's Guide to Easing Panic
Step one.

Relax.
Take a deep breath.
Take one more, and one more. Another.
Relax.
Breathe.
Relax your mind.
Relax. Breathe.

If you cannot, try. Get yourself eased down into a calm, relaxed state. Even in your present circumstances, try, for now.

Step two Continue reading

The Warrior’s Guide

Hi all – today I would like to share another guide, this time from my inner character I call “The Warrior”. He seems to be an integral part to the way I make choices in life, and, as I looked for parts of me who might want to give a guide, he stepped forward. This guide has no explicit purpose, but in a way is a chance to work with the warrior, perhaps learn something – about him, or perhaps about focus, or yourself. I’ll leave it at that, and let the guide speak for itself:

Warrior Guide Icon Continue reading

Silverblade’s Guide to Discerning the Truth

Rebecca Silverblade's Guide to Discerning the Truth

Rebecca Silverblade is another one of my inner characters. She embodies such traits as presence, precision, discernment, and the ability to handle situations without reacting to them. And one thing where precision can serve an important purpose is in discerning the truth from falsehood. This doesn’t just include facts, but also things like the truth of what’s important, the truth of how to act, and the truth of the basis for one’s own emotions and emotional responses. For example, on an inner level, I’ve found that she’s been able to give invaluable perspective at times of confusion or self-doubt.

Like was explained in Creativity’s Guide to Problem-Solving, the below guide was written by way of me trying to let the perspective, embodied by Silverblade, speak on the subject of how to discern the truth. This topic was the prompt, basically, and what follows is my sense of how “she” handled, or would handle, speaking on it.


 

SBGuideT1So you want to discern the truth, do you?

SBGuideT2I suppose you expect me to give you some hint, or proffer some guidance, is that it? This is called a “guide”, after all – I would hardly expect you to expect any less.

SBGuideT3And here it is – the question of the truth. An inquiring mind, looking for it. And what truth are you looking for, pray tell? Continue reading

Creativity’s Guide to Problem-Solving

Creativity's Guide to Problem-Solving

Hi Everyone! This post is going to be a little something different. So, part of my experience in working through things, as I’ve talked about in many places on the site, has been different aspects of my inner life experience being embodied by characters, whose appearance mirrors what their nature is like on the level of their feel, energy, approach to life, etc. One such character is one I call Creativity. She seems to specialize in solving any and all kinds of problems, utilizing things like creativity, lateral thinking, consideration, and playful experimentation. As a character, I’d say she’s generally good-natured and fun to be around, too.

I came up with the idea of having some characters “speak” out guides to things they are strong in, and the first one that came to mind was Creativity and problem-solving. How did I write this? Well, like any storyteller or actor might – I have a sense of Creativity, of her energy, and of how she might go about approaching giving a guide to this topic. So, without further ado, here is Creativity’s Guide to Problem-Solving: Continue reading